God's gift to me

I love being a nurse.

I didn't always know that I wanted to be a nurse. I wanted to be a writer, a lawyer, an athlete, a youth minister, even a surgeon. In college I would usually flat out refuse to talk about nursing outside of class and clinical. I joined the Festival of Praise team, prayed with my household, drank margaritas and studied far less than I should have. Presently I have no desire to join any professional nursing organizations and I usually change out of my scrubs the second I get home. I prefer to volunteer with pro-life ministries, wear dresses and (learn how to) use makeup. I don't fit the bill of someone who loves nursing, but I do love it - passionately.

This occurred to me on my drive home last night as I blasted country music and buzzed through the tree-lined streets of Northern Virginia. Yesterday was typical - I ran around for hours passing meds, listening to heart sounds, calling physicians, prepping for colonoscopies and dressing wounds. About 10 hours into my 12 hour shift something special arrived for me - a dolphin bed, which would more aptly be named "huge bed that is very difficult to maneuver."

I had one precious patient who needed to be moved onto this bed - a severly contracted man, stiff as a board, non-verbal, heavy and unable to help with the transfer at all - and I had no idea how it was going to be done. Did I mention the room was incredibly small with sharp angles? For the better part of an hour three of us pushed and pulled the beds into place, rolled our patient onto a makeshift lift pad, climbed on beds, rearranged furniture and used sheer craftiness and brawn to get our patient into the dolphin bed. We fluffed his pillows, cleaned him up, straightened him out as best we could, suctioned him and sat him up in his new bed. He looked spiffy. He looked like a king. He looked me in the eyes and my heart melted. I thanked God for calling me to this, and I went on with my day.

Nurses do a lot of different things everyday, some more technical than others. We give medicines, check orders, assess and monitor our patients, chart chart chart, prepare for procedures and educate. We listen to our patients, we reassure them, laugh and cry with them, hug them and do everything we can to make them comfortable. We witness miracles, we save lives and we watch people leave this world. Our days and our actions are filled with monumental importance, but we are often too busy to notice. Sometimes all it takes is for a patient to look us in the eyes for us to stop and recognize the importance and beauty of each moment of our days.

I am proud to be a nurse.

I spent 4 years busting my butt to earn what some call the most challenging undergraduate degree. I went to bed after midnight, woke up before dawn, took some ridiculous exams and learned real job skills while still being a student. I spent 3 anxiety-ridden months studying for the hardest test I've ever taken. I cried as I realized that none of that mattered once I actually started working. I endured (and still endure) moments of extreme humiliation as I learn the ins and outs of hospital life. I'm sure that part will never end.

Some people ask me why I'm not a physician. They tell me I'm smart enough and driven enough, that I have good diagnostic skills and a good knowledge of medication. First I tell them that being a nurse is not a stepping stone to becoming a physician. We don't work under physicians, we work together with them. Then I tell them I'm NOT a physician because I AM a nurse. Being a nurse is in my heart. It pumps through my blood to every inch of my being. Being a nurse is who I am. Being a nurse is who I was made to be. God called me to this life, and being a nurse is his great gift to me. Sometimes it is hard, sometimes I want to scream, sometimes I want to punch a surgeon, but all the time I am grateful that this is who I am. I thank God everyday for making me who I am:

Hannah Raymond, RN, BSN

"What we are is God's gift to us. What we become is our gift to God." - Eleanor Powell

Sweet Jesus, thank you for giving me the gift of who I am. I pray that my whole career and my whole life may be a gift to my patients, my co-workers and most importantly you.